40 Comparing american and chinese parents

Some American parents¹ might think² their children³ need better educations to compete⁴ with China and other countries. But how much⁵ do the parents themselves need to change⁶?

A new book called “Battle⁷ Hymn⁸ of the Tiger Mother” by Amy Chua has caused a debate about cultural differences in parenting⁹. Ms. Chua is a professor at the Yale Law School¹⁰ in New Haven, Connecticut, and the mother of two daughters¹¹.

She was raised¹² in the American Midwest by immigrant Chinese parents. In the Chinese culture, the tiger represents strength¹³ and power. In her book, Ms. Chua writes about¹⁴ how she demanded¹⁵ excellence from her daughters.

For example, she threatened¹⁶ to burn¹⁷ her daughter’s stuffed animals¹⁸ unless¹⁹ she played a piece of music perfectly²⁰.

She would insult her daughters if they failed²¹ to meet²² her expectations. Ms. Chua says she had a clear list of what her daughters, Sophia and Louisa, were not permitted to do²³. They could not²⁴ attend a sleepover²⁵, have a play date²⁶, watch TV or play computer games, be in a school play²⁷ or get²⁸ any grade less than an A²⁹.

Many people have criticized³⁰Amy Chua. Some say her parenting methods were abusive. She even³¹ admits that her husband³², who is not Chinese, sometimes³³ objected³⁴ to her parenting style. But she says that was the way³⁵ her parents raised her and her three sisters.

Ms. Chua makes fun³⁶ of her own³⁷ extreme style of parenting. She says she eased³⁸ some of the pressure³⁹ after her younger daughter rebelled and shouted⁴⁰ “I hate⁴¹ my life! I hate you!”

Ms. Chua says she decided to retreat⁴² when it seemed like⁴³ there was a risk⁴⁴ that she might lose⁴⁵ her daughter. But she also says American parents often have low expectations⁴⁶ of their children’s abilities. She says: “One of the biggest differences I see between Western⁴⁷ and Chinese parents is that Chinese parents assume strength rather than⁴⁸ fragility.” Stacy DeBroff has written four books on parenting.

She says the debate over⁴⁹ Ms. Chua’s book has to do with two⁵⁰ questions. What does it mean⁵¹ to be a successful⁵² parent, and what does it mean to be a successful child⁵³? Ms. DeBroff says Amy Chua’s parenting style is not limited to Chinese families.

She says it represents a traditional way of parenting among⁵⁴ immigrants seeking a better future⁵⁵ for their children. But she also sees a risk. When children have no time to be social or to follow⁵⁶ their own interests⁵⁷, they might not develop⁵⁸ other skills⁵⁹ that they need to succeed⁶⁰ in life.

Stacey DeBroff advises⁶¹ parents to develop their own style of parenting and not just repeat the way they were raised⁶².

 And that’s the VOA Special English Education Report. What are your thoughts about parenting styles and cultural differences? Tell us at voaspecialenglish.com or on Facebook at VOA Learning English. For VOA Special English, I’m Mario Ritter

VOCABULARY

1. Parents = pais
2. might think = podem pensar
3. children = filhos
4. compete = competir
5. how much = quanto
6. change = mudar
7. battle = batalha
8. Hymn = hino
9. Parenting = parentalidade
10. Law School = escolar de direito
11. Daughters = filhas
12. Raised = criada
13. Strength = força
14. writes about = escreve sobre
15. demanded = exigia
16. threatened = ameaçava
17. burn = queimar
18. stuffed animals = animais empalhados
19. unless = a menos que
20. perfectly = perfeitamente
21. failed = falhassem
22. meet = attender
23. were not permitted to do = não eram permitidas fazer
24. could not = não poderiam
25. attend a sleepover = ir a uma balada (passar a noite fora)
26. date = namoro
27. school play = peça teatral escolar
28. get = conseguir, obter
29. any grade less than an A = qualquer nota menos que um A
30. have criticized = tem criticado
31. even = até mesmo
32. husband = esposo
33. sometimes = as vezes
34. objected = fazia objeção
35. that was the way = esta foi a forma
36. makes fun = diverte-se
37. own = próprio
38. eased = aliviava
39. pressure = pressão
40. shouted = gritavam
41. hate = odiar
42. retreat = retratar-se
43. it seemed like = parecia que
44. there was a risk = havia um risco
45. might lose = poderia perder
46. low expectations = baixas expectativas
47. Western = ocidente
48. rather than = ao invés de
49. debate over = debate sobre
50. has to do with two = tem a ver com
51. What does it mean = o que significa
52. Successful = bem sucedido
53. Child =filho(a)
54. Among =entre
55. seeking a better future =buscando um future melhor
56. follow = seguir
57. own interests = proprios interesses
58. might not develop = podem não desenvolver
59. skills = habilidades
60. to succeed = ter sucesso
61. advises = aconselha
62. the way they were raised = a forma como eles foram criados